Hello World

Author: TG

  • Goooood morning! Day 5

    I wasn’t really busy yesterday, I just didn’t blog. My fault. I guess it’s not required everyday but I did miss doing it so there’s that. Anyway. Yesterday was chill. Fridays I have to come up with a schedule for. I immediately started to backslide because my schedule was off. That’s on me.

    So I woke up in the morning and the gym wasn’t really an option, I went back to bed till like 8:30. You definitely don’t have the buzz you have by waking up at 6:00. Like you know you missed your golden ticket for the day and have to wait till tomorrow. I want my golden ticket. So we won’t be doing much of that anymore.

    The rest of the day was chill. I went to the gym so that was good. Ended up doing abs and chest and tri’s.

    Also I ended up doing a bible study through chat gpt. It was very profound information. Just researching words and terms

    Dope shit right?! At least I think so. It was very helpful in breaking down different points of view I had never seen before. 10/10 would recommend.

    So I think I’m going to start a personal 75 day challenge but break it up into 15’s so I can stay on track. I’ll design something this evening and probably get back to you tomorrow on it. Chat gpt assisted most likely. Such a helpful tool.

    It’s sabbath and I’m listening to gospel music and most likely going to watch some animal based show. I’ve been doing that since a kid and I really love animals. Instead of watching sermons and stuff on the Bible, I would watch animal planet or something like that. Also going to church so much and reading a lot is probably why I have such a vivid imagination. A little more action with it please lol.

    I also randomly last week went to the farmers market and bought a piece of an aloe leaf. I didn’t know what to do with it so I needed up looking up what to do with it(chat gpt, notice a theme?). And the result I liked the best was an aloe mask. It’s just aloe and honey. So I’m on day 2 of using it. I don’t know if it works but my face is feeling tight as shit. Yes I got all the honey off. Maybe it’s in my pores or something, when I figure out if this is a good thing, I’ll follow up. Well I just looked it up and it’s supposed to be a good thing. It says to lock it in with oils or shea butter and my lotion I’m using is shea so that’s perfect. Also I learned a new word today, humectant.

    Learn something new everyday.

    Happy sabbath!

    I love you black man

  • Day 3 ending

    Today was a really good day! I’m proud to say I stuck to my schedule for the most part and got a shit ton accomplished. I also feel like I can really work inside of the confines of this schedule and not feel like I have no free time. It was only day one but it feels really good to check off hella shit

    Essentially that’s the schedule. I can put whatever I want inside work and read/study. That way I know I can always fill it with something substantive. I’m proud of the fact that I’m actually working towards my goals. Trying to fill in my free time blocks adequately (I had wayyy too much free time) and get to the next level in my life. We are witnessing a rebirth folks. A prodigy that wasted his talents, and rediscovered his will and passion mid life and is back on top! Some people have a mid life crisis, I had an awakening!

    So as I’m typing this I have 2 tasks to complete before bed. I’m proud of myself!

    Also if you’re reading this, it’s never too late to fix your shit and get your mojo back! I’m living proof. Just watch the rebirth!

  • Day 3

    Hey, so I’ve put myself and a tight schedule. I’ll see how that works for me going forward. I pretty much have my day planned to the T for now. I don’t like so much structured stuff, but I know ultimately it’s best for me to be under a strict schedule. At least until I figure it all out.

    I feel great this morning. I did a jog for 30 minutes and now I’m blogging under my allotted “blog” time. Lmao. I think my shots really coming together. I hit my journal and planner already and I’m checking things off one by one.

    Trading is cool today. I saw Tesla looked prime for a big move down and I took a put for tomorrow. Hopefully it takes off and I can save a little money on my deposit next week. That’s the one that ultimately HAS to go well. And I’ll have a couple bucks behind it in case it doesn’t initially. I’ll be fine, as long as I stick to my rules and stay patient. This one HAS to go.

    No real changes to my love life either. I called her this morning and she was irritable and dry like usual. I don’t even know why she still talks to me sometimes. She’s clearly going through the motions. I don’t know. But march 4 isn’t too far away I just have to keep being the best person I can, just to be. With no motive or expectations from anyone. I’m paraphrasing but last night I watched a Myron Golden video on YouTube and he said, “The frustration you have in any relationship in any form is based off of what you feel like you’re not getting from them.” I thought that was a very powerful statement. I’m only upset because I feel like I should be getting more. In every aspect in life. Only expect things from yourself. Wow. Anywho. March 4 is not far away.

    Other than all that. I’m good. All praise to God.

    And I started Dr. Stone season 3 and I like it. And I can’t wait to see the new solo leveling.

    Peace!

  • Day 2

    Ok im up and have completed a couple of tasks. This is really therapeutic, this writing and listening to music. I ran 3.6 miles this morning and then walked the rest as a cooldown till i hit 4 miles on the dot. My body held up well and i believe that’s the longest that i’ve run without stopping for quite some time. Skinny fat. It felt really good though and i was pleased with how i responded to my body feeling good. I have to keep reminding myself thats its only me vs me. Nobody else, no other contestants. With that being said, im happy with my output today thus far.

    I showered and ate a good breakfast, (fruit, eggs, avocado and a hashbrown). Took a look at the markets and saw that not only was i right last week about the market’s direction and what i should play, the market exceeded my expectations. When im tired of giving myself the short end of the stick i will change. No better yet, I AM changed. Who i was yesterday with those goofy and bad trades are not a reflection of who i am TODAY. And my trades going forward will reflect that as well. Nuff said. I don’t want to leave anymore money on the table that God has provided for me. It’s disrespectful to Him to have all these talents and to not only not succeed, but not even put forth a good effort. I’ve honestly been coasting most of my life, off the talents and gifts ive had from God that’s put me at an advantage over the average person. The joke is that because I have above average talents, i have to be working extremely below average to be in the position im in. Imagine that. I just realized how shitty i have to be to still be losing a 100-meter race with a 50-meter head start. Only God and his mercy has helped me reach this point, because i deserve none of this. But we’re working now so the past is just that.

    I just started breaking down the book (The way of the superior man), chapter by chapter and taking notes. I feel really good about the way im intentionally trying to improve. I really appreciate the new and improved dopamine we’ve been actively seeking. Good job ____, Youve been doing great lately and i hope you keep it up. Im really enjoying this blog though. It’s like my secret pen pal. No judgment no worries, just a place where i can vent and get my issues out and in the air. A mental breathing exercise, if you will.

    Today is going by pretty fast as well. It’s amazing how much you can get done before the middle of the day if you wake up and just get to it. I’ve known and experienced it before but clearly have lost sight of it over the last couple of years. Im slowly finding my groove again.

    The rest of my day will be swift. I’m GOING to finish 30 pages of the book with detailed notes, start bible study from the beginning (Genesis 1), Hit an AB workout (I always do one from Pamela Reif. Lately I’ve been doing the lower abs for beginners one.), spend some time with my momma, fold my laundry and study the stock market for tomorrow. Im excited to see how i feel by the end of the day!

    You got this!

    Also, Drink More Water!!!

  • What is my problem?

    Good morning world,

    I’m just waking up this morning. So quick story, I don’t want to be successful subconsciously. I’ll explain. So I started trading stocks/forex about 4 years ago. At this point I know exactly what I’m doing and pretty accurate about how the market moves, but I keep fucking up because I can’t control my emotions. It really is a sickness.

    So I’ve planned out these next 2 weeks trading to a T. And surprise surprise, the market is doing exactly what I anticipated. But guess who didn’t take the plays and actually took a couple plays in the opposite direction. You guessed it, this guy. I’m so frustrated with myself at this point. I also am just coming to the realization that my current girlfriend is a perfect mirror of who I really am. A bad person that thinks they’re good. I make excuses for a lot of things and write off a lot of what I do to depression and not a lot of shit gets done. I’ve also told my parents for the better part of two years I get trading, and I’ll change their lives and nothing has changed. The boy who cried wolf. WOW. I’m not shit either. I mean I knew that but when you really dig, shits ugly as fuck. We’re working on it though. So I’m up at 6 a.m. trying to find something, anything to rearrange the current trajectory of my life.

    I honestly don’t know what to do. I have to psychologically win this war. My life and my soul depends on it. I just have to keep looking for ways to mentally win. Maybe a reward system that diminishes over time. Or it could stay the same if it’s working. You don’t always get things for doing what you’re supposed to do but I can always give myself something. Even if it’s only words. Idk. I’ll make that my priority today.

    I need to lose this girlfriend too. I made a promise that I would try my best with her for 45 days, but honestly, this shit is exhausting dealing with someone that clearly doesn’t want you. I guess it’s partially karma. Enough about her though.

    So today I think I’m going to do a home workout, (cardio day is Wednesday/Saturday, so I’ll most likely just get on the treadmill). I’ll stretch and hop on the computer. Track the market a bit, smoke and journal. Then dive into the book again, this time taking notes and applying it personally to my life. I’ll break it up into sections of 30. Then I need to see if the market has any offerings for me today and in the afternoon, I’ll try and do something with my momma and relax. I need to eat better too. I’m slick skinny fat. I have a gut that I’ve been sucking in for years. Doesn’t everyone though? No? Just me? Ok.

    Wish me luck on a productive day! And to my wife, I miss you and I’m sorry I’m taking so long, but it’ll be worth it I promise.

    Oh and the 45 days with cruella ends march 4.

    Xoxo

  • I think I’m love bombing myself!

    Pretty straightforward. So this year I’ve talked to 3 women. The first was a very sweet childhood friend of mine. Shes kind, caring and thoughtful. Incredibly beautiful and on paper, should be everything that I want in a woman. It just doesn’t click for us, and I guess that’s my fault. She ended up cutting me off (deservedly so) after years of stringing her along. That led me to do a deep pussyless dive into how i was treating women and how, at my big age, I’m too old to not have my shit together. So we ended up going our separate ways.

    Contestant #2 for 2024 was a career minded very successful woman. She made more money than me, but it didn’t bother me because I could still pay for everything we wanted to do and did comfortably. She wanted to take roots in Atlanta, and I wanted to travel the world and wander for a bit. We had been talking off and on over the course of a couple years but nothing serious till the summertime. That summertime love. Maybe it’s the heat, or the sun, but I always find some form of love when the sun is out. We went on a couple of dates, got a high-rise hotel for a weekend, that was very dope. Cooked for each other as well. Me a basic breakfast (eggs, potatoes, fruit bowl). She ended up cooking a wonderful salmon meal. Thats another thing that’s on my list this year, leveling up my cooking. I need to be in somebody’s class or something. But yeah. Sex was amazing. Lots of impromptu things and I really enjoyed picking her brain. Extremely intelligent as well. We ended up not working because she knew I was leaving and pulled an ultimatum. Fuck. I really did care for her too, but I guess it was for the best because that’s the only way we would both get what we want.

    I’ll be right back, I have to get a pillow for my bad ass back (another days story).

    ok. Im back.

    Contestant #3. (current situation) So there I was minding my business in late October. On a hike and I met a girl. She is a veteran like me. We joke and laugh and click immediately. I’m happy, temporarily. Well it’s kinda my fault. I’ll explain. When I first met her I ended up getting her information a week later. Anyways, she ended up going out on 2 dates with me in the same week, which is pretty rare for me. I haven’t done that in years, literally. So anyways, we go on the dates, things go well, a little too well because I’m telling her I love her like a week later, and she’s saying it to. and as I’m typing this I’m realizing that I’m indeed love bombing myself. So anyways, I start going over her place. At first for a day. After that for days, very week. Not only that but we’re talking about getting married, and matching tattoos. LMAO, the shame as I’m typing this. SO now we’re fighting. Like all the fucking time. Like I’m back in high school frustration. For what, not a damn thing. So I tried to break up a couple times and it hasn’t worked yet because I’m weird about wanting to leave but not before i get tired of lusting after them. Shit’s hella uncool and weird. I’m going to address that internally immediately. I been correcting all these grammatical errors like small i’s like a lil dweeb. back to the story. so then i get my hands on this book, called The way of the Superior man by David dieda. Life changing stuff. So basically now im in a win win situation. If i do all these things for this woman and she plays me or im not happy, its great practice for my wife to be, wherever she is. If not and SHE is my wife, then i’ll have great patience and be able to take on anything. So i consider it a win win.

    I’m actually really enjoying getting my thoughts out like this. I think this is going to become a regular thing for me, even if it isnt much. Like Julie Julia. She ended up having a whole movie written about her. (theyy aint fenna write a story about you nigga).

    Life is looking up. I just have to consistently stay out my way. This will be a big time in my life if I do it right, God willing. See you at the top!

    Lee – Full Album Lofi Type Beat is what I’m listening to while I’m typing this. Catch a vibe

  • Day 1

    I guess this is my way of getting my feelings down on “paper”. I’ve always enjoyed writing, I feel like it’s my best form of communication by far. Funny thing is, that I only type about 30 words a minute so I can’t really say I’m that proficient.

    A little about me, I’m black (yes, I had to state that first but stay with me). I was in the military for most of my 20’s and I’m mid 30’s now. I’m getting used to being called Unk and little wrinkles and things showing up on my face. I’m kinda in amazement. Its actually the first time in my life I can visibly see myself aging. I enjoy anime, all kinds of music, and learning random facts about life and people. I’m slick a nerd that doesn’t really come off as one. I also think I’m a little bit cooler sometimes than I actually am. I blame anime, I guess.

    Enough about me for now, I’m kinda a private person. Anyways this is my first blog. I don’t know where this will go or what this will accomplish, but this will be my little slice of the internet. Just for me, you can look but you can’t touch. If anyone ever reads this, I hope it brings them the peace and happiness I’m in search of, if only for a little bit.

    I guess the main reason for this vlog is to just vent. And be able to put my feelings and thoughts out in the air, even if I’m the only one who will ever read it. I’m grateful for this year. I feel like it’ll be a really good one. Plus, I’m due for a win, hopefully.

    I’m listening to gmills and aimless – drifting. It’s such a pretty song. I’d love to be able to create beats. I think I’d be pretty good at it. Anywho, enough rambling for today. This is my year. And if you’re reading this, whenever you read this, this is your year too!